The Intentional Conversation

One on one. One to one. Interchangeable terms for the same thing, an intentional conversation meant to accomplish very specific goals. First and foremost, a one on one is meant to build a relationship. It might serve to create a new relationship or to deepen an existing relationship. Relationships are the foundation of community, any community. In our faith communities it is the relationships that keep people coming.
Second, a one on one is meant to undercover those things that a person is most passionate about. Passionate as in what they love most, fear most, are angry about most. It's the first step in identifying a person's self-interest. Self-interest is what really motivates people to act, and act with conviction, commitment and in strength.
Third, a one on one is meant to bring clarity to a person. People don't often get to talk about themselves, not in a meaningful way at least. When a person is being asked about those significant events that have shaped them, it's at that point a person can actually recognize that....those events made them the person they are and motivate them to act on certain issues! It also helps the person asking the questions to become more clear on why a person behaves they way they do.
Last, but certainly not least, a one on one is a way to simply gather information about a person: where were they born? Siblings? Edcation? Hobbies? Faith journey? The basics we all want to know about each other and share all the time.
Taking the time to learn about another person is one way to build our community. It's how we break the cycle of isolationism caused by our modern life and it's lack of interpersonal connections.